What’s Your Legacy?

Episode 63 Professional Legacy
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Welcome to morning coffee and mimosas. I'm Cristina and I'm Joe. We are a father-daughter duo. We come here Sunday mornings, but you can come here anytime you please. We banter about life, about business and we do it over Coffee and Mimosas.

Well, good morning. Remote Cristina. Hello. 

Good morning. Fash. 

Cristina is in Florida and I'm here holding the Fort down in New Jersey. Yep. 

He's always holding the Fort down in New Jersey. That's it? I am coming from sunny, warm Florida. 

And I am here. Not temperature is not bad, but it's a rainy day, but happy day cause we're recording.

So I'm sending some sunshine vibes from sunny, Florida over 

to you today. There we go. We may absolutely actually may need that. So very good. 

Good morning to you, our listeners. Yes, we have to start by saying that this is a very, very important Sunday. I think we have to start by wishing our listeners. What do you mean?

Why? No, I know that I wanted you to say. 

I just thought I was going to trip you up here. I thought I was going to maybe ruin the rest of your 

I'm not that stupid. I'm pretty stupid, but I'm not that 

stupid. This Sunday is an important day. Happy mother's day. So for all of you listeners, whether you are a mother, whether you are an awesome aunt, whether you are celebrating a mother or everybody is a little bit of a mother, especially on mother's day, but happy mother's day to all of you.

That's right. 

Very much so. 

yeah, today we're celebrating our mother. And even though you didn't remember, it was mother's day. I did. 

Don't, don't make that, don't make that a permanent record that I going to get in trouble for 

like a Scarlet letter that you were for the rest of the day.

But I think our topic is kind of perfect for today because what is more, indicative of a legacy than a mother, 

right. I mean, moms leave us with so much of themselves, of their thoughts, their feelings, and they, molded us and helped us and guide us. Yell at us hit a, oh, wait, I'm sorry.

Going down that too, 

because we need 

it. That's correct. But you're right. So this topic today, is really about your legacy professionally, personally, and so on. how will people remember you? And that, that sounds like depressing when you're, you know, like how do you, how will you be remembered?

But let's talk about it professionally, in your job and the people that you work with and, report to you. And so on. That's what this is about. 

I don't know that I didn't take it as depressing dad. I don't know why 

you find it. No, no, no, because when I said, how will people remember you?

It's like, I'm not here anymore. You know, like you're gone. But it's pretty 

cool that each and every one of us are at a point in our lives where we can actually control our legacy. Because once you're at the point where like people now have to remember you, it's up to everyone else to say the things about how rotten Joe was.

Right. That's a good point. 

I could change that now. I could, I could be better. It's not, I'm not too old to get better. 

That's the cool thing, right? Like we have an opportunity, all of us, our listeners to kind of control our legacy and write our story and whether it's personal or professional. I think mother's day is a perfect day for us to kind of think about the legacy that many important people, women in our have left and think about what is the legacy that personally and professionally we would like to leave behind for others. 

That's right before it's too late.

And, you know, it's, it's so true. Cause you know, growing up and starting work and so on, we have a, you know, I'll think of bosses that I've had or people that I've worked with and so on. And they've left me with some wonderful, you know, thoughts, some, some that even, even bosses that weren't great, but I've made fun of them over the years if you know what I'm saying, but when I say made fun of.

what, perhaps they weren't great at. I learned something from, because I decided I'm not going to do that ever. Like, I'll be a different way. but in our case, I think most of us, if we're decent and we're going to go through some ways to make sure that this is, true. But, we will never, we may never know.

The mark that we've left on other people. And I think that's so profound. And if you keep that in mind, it really has an impact on how you go about your day to day business, you know, professionally and personally. 

Well, I think that's kind of a cool thought because it's infrequent that people tell you, this is what you mean to me, or this is what I learned from you.

So it's kind of like putting things out there without expectation of having, reciprocation of somebody saying. Oh, yes. I learned this from you or you, left this powerful impression on me. It's very rare that you get that. So you kind of, I think it's funny what you said about, like when, when I first got into the leadership role, there's not a ton of training on how to be a leader or how to, you know, Manage people and all of that, but you're so right.

Like the first thing you do is you think back to all of the experiences you've had good, bad, indifferent, you know, all of it. And you just start to kind of like, just copy the things you like and try and make sure you don't do the things. 

Exactly. And it's cute. Like. This is silly, not a legacy, but it's kind of a legacy.

I had a boss, at the, one of the accounting firms I worked at and, uh, you know, he was, you know, he didn't do anything special. you know, this sounds terrible. He was just very instructive. and it was just, you know, everyday, but there's a line that I use. I still do this at work and people love it, but I learned it from him I would be leaving at the end of it.

And then he would, he would say, oh, Joe, Joe, and I would turn around and I'd say, oh, what what's happened? He'd say, thank you so very much for coming in today. You know, like a joke. It was a joke. Like I had a choice, right.

It was cute. I started the whole appreciation 

and you know, it's for showing up, even though you had no choice, 

why is it because you so infrequently didn't show up, maybe. 

It was so funny. I know it was so cute. And so I actually do that, like I'll, I'll occasionally work and it's just funny because I'll just say, you know, oh, oh Christine.

Yeah, what's up. Thank you so much for coming in today. And everyone gets it. It's like, uh, yeah, thanks. I didn't have so, and I know everyone listening is like, well, that's really corny. It's not, it's, it's a little thing that I carried through. If you think of legacy, right. I am repeating. What someone did that I enjoyed in a, in a, you know, he was my supervisor and so on.

It 

is also the very corny and that is part of your legacy. Should you, did you ever leave? I hope it doesn't happen for a very, very long time. Should you ever leave your part of your legacy will be, some other, you know, accolades and adjectives that are much more meaningful, but corny won't be 

too far off.

Yeah. That and that's okay. I'm fine with that. I'm good. 

And so the. We have a text chain that goes, and every single day you are nothing. If not consistent, every day, we get a dad joke that comes to that chat and they are. As corny as they come,

but you liked them. 

We love them. It's part of your legacy. It brings smiles to all of our faces 

through your coordinator. I'll tell you the one today. See, I'll tell you the one that I sent out this morning. A telescope just turned up at our house. We're not sure is. But we're certainly looking into it.

That's a dad 

joke.

That's it? That's my legacy. Corny dad jokes in the morning. 

But 

this is the idea. What is it that we are leaving for others? And it's not so much to remember me or you buy and so on.

What little little gifts are we leaving others? Are we leaving them with some more knowledge than they had before? Are we leaving them with appreciation knowing that, that they were appreciated? Are we leaving them with good feelings, you know, Debbie day or during the week and so on? it's so important that these little, these little things, Yeah.

And like you said, no one will, no one probably will ever say, you know, Joe, thanks. You've always left me with a, B, C, D E F G, whatever it is. but how cool is that, that we are remembered and because we'll never know. I think that's the power in it, you know? So be careful what we leave. 

Well, I mean, uh, it's, I guess a legacy like in the definition would be long and once you're gone, but we all have probably little mini legacies, right?

Like every time that you there's impressions, you leave on people every single day that they remember, or just a feeling they have when they think of you. So I just think it's kind of cool to like, be mindful of that. And really think about like, what is, what is it that you want people to think about when they think about you?

Right. 

Like, I would want people to feel like, you know, like I would always want people to feel like I was kind and nice to like, you know, you wouldn't want to have part of your leg CB that you were a mean girl. Right. But actually you, dad, you don't want to be a mean 

girl. no, not at all. The mean, or the girl part.

Um, so, along with this, what goes along with this too, is, are you investing in your team or investing in others? Meaning it doesn't have to just be money, you know, but are we helping them develop? Yeah. Are we giving them time and instructing them? Are we allowing them to take courses even to enrich themselves?

Are we, um, helping people. Correct and help them to grow professionally, and so on. 

the people feel empowered when they're with you or do they feel like, What does the adverse of that? Do people feel empowered when they're with you or do they feel like they're stifled?

Yeah. Right. Do they have to come to you for every single decision that they make? Do you, do you have to, you know, you have to be a gatekeeper for everything that happens, you know, or, or are you giving people enough flexibility to even make mistakes or to, but to learn and to grow because we learn and grow through our mistakes and it doesn't.

we do tragic things, but in our jobs, you know, if somebody doesn't do a great job on a presentation or something else, you know, then we have to allow people to do that. That's how people learn. You know, 

it's also allowing people to like, take the credit and have like a moment in the sun, right?

Like I think that's a part of, you can leave a really impactful legacy by not being the one who's. At the center of the attention and 

accolades, correct? Correct. And, you know, that's a great point. There's nothing more demeaning and, really, suppresses people's enthusiasm and enjoyment than when they are not given credit for what they do.

Or you as a supervisor take the credit, you know? Yes, we did this, we did that, whatever. And you don't mention who did it. No 

right. Because people are all proud of their work and, you know, everybody puts their heart what they do. So if you put your heart into something and then somebody else turns it around as their own, that's, like a very fast way for somebody to feel like a piece of crap.

And you will not have a good legacy from that. No, 

no. So it's at what, when you're thinking about, because you're, you know, you're a little bit riper than I. Is that a nicer way to stay old on try, I am going to like, if you were to count the number of, if we were to count the number of ways I've said old, it could be a very fun drinking 

game.

I think we'll have to have a linguistic class. Let let's use every blankets. The Saurus for old Christine. 

Exactly, but you're a little bit riper than, than, you know, I am. 

I don't like that. Stick with older. 

You're not an overripe banana, you know, you're a riper piece of fruit,

not a coup not yet bruised, but you know, you're not, not the vibrant yellow that you once were. Anyway. Um, I did have a mimosa this morning. You can't tell. Um, but anyway, you're a little bit riper than I am. So if I were to ask you, what is most important? Like what is the legacy that you want to leave behind?

And like, when you're thinking about your professional life and personal life, like what is, what is paramount to your legacy? 

that, that I cared. I think that I cared and that I helped, to the best of my ability. I helped the people that, report to me do better and advance. And there's a dog 

The dog at your house or a dog at your in-law's house on Roscoe 

didn't even make any noise when we ran. 

I know. I know. yeah, I figure it's very, very important That as, as you move up in an organization that the people that are working with you and for you, that you help them have visibility with senior management, that you help them get credit for what they're doing and you help guide them and help them to grow professionally.

If you can do that, you literally expand the capabilities of, of your area. And I want to explain that there's some people. Who feel, you know what, I can't let you get a promotion or too much credit or do better because then you're going to take my job. Right? that means that there's a box and the box can only fit X number of people.

But when you help people grow and develop and take on new skills and learn. Techniques or whatever it is that your department does, that box grows and it starts to expand like a balloon filling up with air. And therefore the pie is bigger than before. And you actually, you should not really be afraid that somebody is growing into your position unless you're incompetent.

If you're incompetent, then basically you should be, you should be happy. You 

know? And I, I always think part of the, like a shift from being an individual contributor to being. In leadership is that your position is different. You're not meant to be the one to shine anymore. right. The whole point is to have people that are smarter than you.

Like, that's what they say. Like the best teams are when you feel like you have a team of people that are smarter than you. And like, I feel like for me, I want to be somebody that invests in my team, is a team player. Never, you know, somebody that's always kind of like. working with the team, not somebody that has people working for them.

I hate that. and I think it's pretty cool when all of a sudden you see somebody grow right before your eyes and you see somebody that you're like. Wow that because sometimes you look at your team and you say, okay, well, if you could do it that way, or you think about the way you would do something, right?

Like it's the right way to do something. And when you all of a sudden see the people on your team and you say, wow, they are freaking better than me. 

And that's what exactly, exactly. Because your, your role as a leader is. To, you know, show people how great you are. And so on your role is to develop the skills and the expertise of multiple people so that you, you are exponentially helping the team, 

letting people show how good they are and notice how good the people on our team are.

Right. So I just think that's a cool thing, right? It would be nice to have a legacy where like, everybody can control everybody. Right. But like every member of your team, you can say every single member of this team grow in some way. While we were working together. 

Yes, That's it. And so when you do that, you, then again, I keep bringing it up.

You may never hear it. You may never get praise. You may never get any. Just know that you have left a positive mark on people and people will be remarking about you well, into the future long after you're either not a tech company or you've retired or whatever has happened. and uh, through this, one of the things that's very important is that you should really spend time as you can, with the people who are on your team face to face.

You know, and now obviously we've had a pandemic and so on, so that would be zoom meetings and so on. In person and getting to know people. And I'm going to tell you a story about, um, his name was Coleman Schneider, and he went by coach Snyder, had nothing to do with cocaine to do with soda.

Not, not the other way around. I'm sorry. I'm not. 

And this is a family podcast. 

Anyway, 

we're about to add something else to your legacy that you do not want 

there. Yeah. My, my dad worked for him. I'm just moving on and I would just keep calling. Uh, my dad worked for him, and um, later in my dad's career and, when I started out, he gave me a job.

Uh, as a consultant there, I did some consulting for him for a period of time. Loved the man. He was a, a guy that was, uh, a self-made man entrepreneur. Built up, he was a multimillionaire, um, made some business mistakes, lost everything, and then restarted all up again and became a multimillionaire again. I mean, this guy was, uh, I admired him, but he did something in his company that, I think was just beautiful.

He had about 30 employees and every day, no lie every day at five o'clock. In his office. He had a bar in his office and every day, no matter who you were in the company, you came into his office, the door was open and everybody just sat around and chatted and he would make you a drink, whatever you want from water soda to two drinks.

And it was beautiful because it was a way for the person, the part-timer in the mail room. To, uh, you know, one of his partners and so on, you are all sitting together and talk about whatever you wanted to talk about with him. and that was beautiful. You talk about being together in that great 

and making every single person at the end of the day, feel like they're at the same exact level, regardless of who they were.

Frank for any person that's part of the team and everybody sits and has a drink together. That's so 

nice. Correct. And, and it was just beautiful because I was just a kid. Uh, my dad worked there and, you know, he was just letting him, it was like, I, I think I was still in college or something and, uh, he'd been hired me later on F for some other stuff, but here I am just a kid and this whole, these adults and what, and I was treated like, you know, Joe, what are you having? You know, blah, blah, blah, you know, whatever you you know, what'd you do today? How did it go? Anything? It was just great. It was just great.

And I think that, when I say, be with your colleagues, your, you know, be with people just on a level, just be human, the human. Yeah. show people your fault, you know, let them, let them see, you know, laugh at your mistakes, you know, and, and all that. And it's, and it's really good. and I just think that's very important and it ties into this allows you and we brought up the empowerment part, you know, w when you kind of do this, it makes it easier for you to really help people to shine.

So, 

because all of a sudden, you're somebody that's. An approachable person that they can share something that's authentic with rather than always feeling guarded. 

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So, um, yeah. So what do you think? Good, good idea. We'll put a bar in the morning, coffee and mimosas, uh, home office.

I think it's a very good idea. I think we have a bar already in the morning coffee, normal system. 

And it's, it's flexed some different drinks other than just Coffee and Mimosa lessons the last several weeks dabbled in. Manhattan's do we have, I think this is a very good idea and listeners, the door's always open if you know, where Morning Coffee and Mimosas Headquarters is the bar is always open 

world headquarters here.

Oh, that's great. Well, we're going to have a legacy of being a couple of drunks. 

If I know, we really have to be careful. Hey, I'm the coffee guy. I'm I'm. You're the one who's drinking coffee. I'm having coffee. That's my big blue mug on the logo. There 

you go. There you go. No, but I think this is good. So listeners, we are going to think about our own legacy.

And I think if at anything, it's just an opportunity for us to all be a little bit more deliberate with the things that we do and the way we approach, every person that we encounter in our life. Is that a vote towards the legacy that I want to have, or is that something that is less than.

It'd be a good way for us to measure, like whether we had a successful day or not. Was this a legacy day or is this a day that we want to erase? 

Uh, you know what I think you're right. And if, if more of us did that and thought. You know, I'm going to tell you something I have actually, and I'm sure some of you have, I've apologized to people, sometimes you're in the, you know, the heat of something and somebody goes off and, and then I'll say, yeah.

I w I was a little short, that wasn't really right. You know, and then just apologize. 

Yeah. Or I wasn't I didn't conduct myself the way that, however, you know, However, I just conducted myself.

Wasn't, indicative of who I really am. Right. You know? Cause cause sometimes we all, we all fuck up sometimes 

just like you did, it's a family show.

We all mess up sometimes, you 

know, 

And I mean, that's part of being human 

too. And that's when you share that and you, you step up and say, look, I'm sorry for what I said, that was, that was out of line, you know? 

And I mean, listen, what's every single legacy you think about any like big figure in history or in your family, The major things that people remember, but everybody's got a few scars that like, you know, are there, right. So nobody's ever expecting you to be like, nobody's perfect. So it's, it's fine to, you know, it's like all cumulative, right? Like the more, the more deposits you put in the bank of the good and you know, what you positively want to be remembered by.

The less, anybody's going to remember the, you know, few times that you might've been a complete jerk 

true now, but, and that's, that's the idea is that we are humans. So when you share that and you, you let that out we try to protect your, you know, I have to be perfect for everybody. No, you don't.

You just gotta be you and be the best you, you can. So very good. I enjoyed this. I ain't tried this 

to, I look forward to the next episode is getting a B in person again. 

Yes. Yes. You've got to stop traveling so much, 

but will do for now. So anyway, listeners, go do something to create your legacy and let us know what it is.

Let us know what you would like to be remembered by and share it with us. And we'll be able to feature it on our Instagram page. 

That's it. 

Wherever you are, whatever your story. Thanks for spending time with us this morning. Go and make a difference in your world.

What's the temperature down there in Florida right now. 

Ooh. It's you would hate it. It's like 91 degrees right now. Well, I liked 

the heat. You do. I don't like the 

cold. You don't dress for the heat.

I guess you'd like it down here all the time.